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Archive for October, 2010

Vespers…

Everyone has been full of advice.

Rest.

Relax.

Enjoy these moments of having time to yourself.

Meanwhile, my body is changing still. I feel different.

I ask myself, “Is this it? Am I going into labor?”

Anyone who knows me knows this is really hard.

Waiting.

I want schedules. Control.

I have none of it. I’m literally living life in each moment.

Tonight

I sat on the front porch as the sun went down.

I watched the last glimpses of blue sky from this October day disappear.

I imagined what shapes the clouds formed.

I heard the crickets chirping their evening song.

I held my belly and prayed.

Breathe deeply, sister, breathe deeply.

Not knowing what the days ahead will hold, I took a longer look and listened more intently.

Even if it was just for tonight.

 

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A New Addition?

For the past 4 years, this little guy has been the one and only “kid” in our lives.

So, now that there’s a baby entering our life, we’ve been talking to Jovi about the new arrival. ¬†We’re in the waiting phase and excited for Baby Johns to arrive very soon! Last Thursday, I was on my way to Barry’s work for a party for us when I saw a bundle of fur walking down the road by our neighbor’s house. I hadn’t seen this dog before but recognized that she was definitely someone’s beloved pet. I called her and she came right to me. I knocked on a couple of doors but couldn’t find anyone home.

She was wearing a harness collar but had no ID tag. Running late to the party, I took her back inside and put her in Jovi’s kennel for a little while. When I returned, I walked her through the neighborhood, sent emails to neighbors but no one seemed to be looking for her.

Since we couldn’t find her owners right away, we played. We didn’t know her name so she took to answering to “Lil Bit” and “Prissy”. Jovi certainly enjoyed her being here and wanted to play a lot.

I was really worried he was thinking she was the new addition to our family! Once Barry got home, he helped me put up missing flyers for the neighbors too. Thursday night was like one big slumber party in our bed! Barry said he got no sleep between Jovi being at his feet, our visitor sleeping between us, and his wife’s big belly!

On Friday morning, his rightful owners called and were relieved to find her. Come to find out, her name is “Flower” and we were “heroes for the day”. It was great to see her returned to her family safely!

Of course, this means that Jovi is an only child for a couple of more days. However, the baby should arrive soon. We took our friend Jen to the airport the other night and Jovi went with us, he apparently got tired and decided to sleep here.

Whew! What are we going to do?

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My aching body is signaling that the end is drawing near. My joints hurt and it’s a chore to get from a sitting to standing position. Whew! A few months ago, a friend gave me a book called, “Prayers for Expectant Mothers” by Angela Thomas Guffey. I was reading through it this morning and found a prayer that fit me well:

…. “I feel like a mess. My emotions have worn thin. I’m tired of feeling lousy. Tears spring up easily. I know that only You can sustain me. I don’t want to be a total grouch these last few weeks. Please lift me above the discomfort, and let me find joy in these days. I am counting on You to provide stamina where I have none. I am trusting You to carry me to delivery. Help me to hear Your voice above the aches and pains– Your whispers of comfort and hope.” (page 181)

I decided to grab my cup of coffee and head to the front porch with Jovi this morning. It was a beautiful morning and the cool, autumn air helped clear my thoughts and aching body. I grabbed my pen and paper and wrote a reflection. It helps me have perspective over the aches and pains.

What an interesting year it has been….

I started off this pregnancy with fear and anxiety. I was so worried about losing this child I had wanted for so long. As he grew and moved around, I smiled at each movement I felt within. He was growing strong and healthy.

And now, 9 months and countless miles later, we are in a different city, different home, and different lifestyle. There are no sermons for me to write for Sunday. There are no deacon meetings to attend (I’m not complaining, you know). Instead, I wait and prepare. I prepare my hospital bag. I register for the hospital. I cook and freeze meals. I clean and change sheets for guests. I prepare and wait.

I still smile when I feel him move within. I smile when I walk past his room (pictures coming!). I smile and laugh out loud when he kicks his dog brother Jovi off my lap.

The truth is, I can’t wait to meet him. It’s almost over and yes, I have few things to complain about. Pregnancy has been good to me. But, I have a feeling, the best is yet to come!

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